Overcoming Fears of Intimacy
Below is a MRR and PLR article in category Society -> subcategory Relationships.
Overcoming Fears of Intimacy
Summary:
Sam, 42, had never been married. Although he had fallen in love before, every step toward commitment led him to flee. When loneliness became unbearable, Sam sought help.Article:
At 42, Sam had never tied the knot. It wasn’t for lack of love; instead, each time a relationship veered toward commitment, he felt compelled to escape.
As loneliness weighed heavily on him, Sam reached out to me.
"I want a relationship," he confessed. "Yet every time I get close, I pull away. I don’t even know what scares me, but something does!"
Through our discussions, it became clear: Sam feared that if someone truly knew him, they wouldn’t like him. To prevent rejection, he showered his partners with kindness, hoping to earn their affection. But eventually, feeling trapped, he would pull back. His partner’s understandable frustration only deepened his sense of entrapment, extinguishing his feelings for them. This cycle repeated over and over.
The core issue was Sam’s belief that once known, he would be rejected. Out of this fear, he tried to control his partner's perception with acts of kindness, leading to feelings of being trapped, which prompted him to flee. Thus, fears of rejection and being overwhelmed governed his life, preventing him from experiencing true love.
Sam’s actions were rooted in core shame?"the false belief in his inherent flaw and unlovability. As long as he held onto this belief, he feared rejection. He surrendered himself until feeling trapped, prompting his flight.
This wounded self?"the part that believed he wasn’t enough?"was driven by false beliefs. It couldn’t recognize his true essence as a unique expression of the Divine. To heal this wounded self, Sam needed to cultivate a loving adult self?"one connected to a spiritual source of love and truth.
Enter the Six Step Inner Bonding process?"a transformative practice to nurture a loving adult self and heal the wounded self’s fears and misconceptions. By engaging with Inner Bonding, Sam gradually developed a self that cherished his authentic essence. As his sense of personal power grew, his fear of rejection diminished. He realized that a woman’s rejection was based on her fears, not his inadequacies. Understanding this, he stopped taking rejection personally.
Without the fear of rejection, Sam was no longer compelled to alter himself to control a partner’s feelings. Freed from self-surrender, the sensation of being trapped and overwhelmed in relationships vanished.
Over time, through consistent practice of the Six Steps of Inner Bonding, Sam fortified his loving adult self and overcame his fears of rejection and entrapment. Today, Sam is happily married, eagerly awaiting the birth of his child.
This transformation didn’t happen overnight. It required time to dismantle false beliefs about his worthiness and lovability, to establish a connection with a greater spiritual source, and to be honest rather than controlling in relationships. The journey spanned several years of dedicated inner work.
But if you were to ask Sam about the journey, his eyes would light up, a broad grin confirming the profound joy he now experiences. Undeniably, every moment invested was worth it.
You can find the original non-AI version of this article here: Overcoming Fears of Intimacy.
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