Making Marriage Work Part 4

Below is a MRR and PLR article in category Society -> subcategory Marriage.

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Making Marriage Work: Part 4


In this fourth installment of our five-part series on making marriage work, we delve into how personal spiritual guidance can illuminate relationship issues. We'll continue following Joan and Justin’s journey as Joan applies Steps 3 and 4 of the Inner Bonding process to address challenges in their marriage.

Understanding Relationship Struggles


Earlier in Part 1, we explored how fears of rejection and engulfment often lie at the heart of relationship problems. Part 2 introduced a simplified version of the Six-Step Inner Bonding process, which includes:

1. Willingness
2. Choosing the intent to learn
3. Dialoguing with feelings
4. Dialoguing with your Higher Power
5. Taking loving action
6. Evaluating the action

In Part 3, we saw how Joan and Justin navigated Step 2, focusing on the intent to learn. Now, let's see how Joan goes through Steps 3 and 4.

Diving into Feelings and Spiritual Guidance


In Step 3, Joan examines her beliefs and behaviors that cause her pain. With compassion and curiosity, she engages with her emotions?"anger, loneliness, fear, and resentment?"just as a loving parent would comfort a child.

The Dialogue


Loving Adult Joan: Little Joanie, what thoughts or actions are causing you so much pain?

Inner Child Joanie: You keep saying Justin doesn’t love me anymore. You scare me by suggesting that his work means he doesn’t care about me. You make me feel like there’s something wrong with me because he’s often busy.

Seeking Higher Guidance


Moving to Step 4, Joan turns to her Higher Power?"whether it’s God, Goddess, her Higher Self, or another spiritual guide.

Joan asks: What is the truth about my belief that if Justin works late, he doesn’t love me?

By quieting her mind and opening herself to receive Guidance, Joan realizes:

Higher Guidance: Justin sometimes works late simply because he has a lot to do. It’s not about you. Other times, he stays late because he fears your blame and nagging. Though he loves you, he doesn’t always feel loved by you, and staying away is his coping strategy.

Recognizing Truth and Lies


The feelings that emerge can often differentiate truth from falsehood. When Joan tells herself that Justin doesn’t love her, she feels isolated and fearful. However, embracing the newfound truth brings her peace and clarity.

Joan asks her Guidance: What are the loving actions I can take for myself? What would be in my best interest?

Higher Guidance: Focus on activities that bring you joy when Justin is late?"connect with friends, read, or take that dance class you’ve been considering. Happiness comes from self-care, not placing responsibility for it on Justin. He’ll be more inclined to spend time with you when he sees your joy.

In our final installment, we will explore how Joan progresses through Steps 5 and 6 of Inner Bonding. Stay tuned to discover how this journey continues to unfold.

You can find the original non-AI version of this article here: Making Marriage Work Part 4.

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