The secrets to improving kids behaviour

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The Secrets to Improving Kids' Behavior


Summary:

Effective parenting involves a variety of strategies to enhance children's behavior, whether addressing bothersome habits or managing strong-willed kids. This article explores the best question to ask when children misbehave and offers proven principles to improve their behaviors.

Article:

At some point, every parent experiences frustration with their child's annoying habits, whether it's a toddler's whining, a child's messy room, or a teen's rude language.

Changing these behaviors can be challenging. Should you ignore your child's annoying habits or address them directly? A helpful guideline is to intervene when behaviors are dangerous to the child or significantly affect the comfort of others.

Consider also: Is the behavior appropriate for the child’s age? For instance, expecting an eight-year-old to be quiet for twenty minutes while you’re on the phone is reasonable, but not for a two-year-old.

It’s beneficial to understand the child’s current state of mind and any external factors influencing their unusual behaviors.

Here are four effective principles for changing your child’s behavior, which require patience and persistence:

Principle 1: Change Your Initial Response

Children's behaviors often aim for a payoff, such as attention. To change their behavior, start by changing your response. If your child whines to get their way, resist responding or giving in.

Principle 2: Practice Desired Behaviors

Teaching new behaviors involves rehearsal. Don’t just tell kids what you expect?"have them practice it. For a young whiner, practice asking for things in a normal voice.

Principle 3: Minimize Undesirable Behaviors

If children persist with old behaviors despite your guidance, either ignore, sidestep, or offer consequences without nagging. Change takes time, especially for ingrained behaviors.

Principle 4: Highlight Positive Behaviors

When your child behaves appropriately, show genuine appreciation. Focus more on positive behaviors than negative ones. For a child who usually whines, celebrate when they use a normal voice.

Consistency is key, so stick to these principles and adapt them to fit your circumstances. The power lies in having a plan, more than the specifics of the plan itself.

For additional strategies to address behaviors like whining, tantrums, and sibling rivalry, explore Michael Grose's book, "One Step Ahead," available at [parentingideas.com.au](http://www.parentingideas.com.au).

Michael Grose is a renowned parenting educator in Australia, offering insights through books, presentations, and media appearances. For more tips on raising happy children and resilient teens, visit [parentingideas.com.au](http://www.parentingideas.com.au) and subscribe to the "Happy Kids" newsletter for a free report on sibling rivalry.

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