U. S. May Join Opec. 1 4 Of World s Untapped Oil Reserves In Artic.
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U.S. Considering OPEC Membership as Arctic Oil Reserves Discovered
Summary
Recent exploration in the Arctic Ocean has led geologists to estimate that about a quarter of the world's untapped oil and gas reserves are located there. In light of this discovery, the U.S. is contemplating joining OPEC.
President Bush, sharing a smile and a joke with King Abdullah of Saudi Arabia during a press event in Nome, Alaska, remarked, "It seems we've got as much oil off Alaska as our good friend the King has in the Saudi desert. Maybe America should consider joining OPEC. At the very least, it could give us more influence on gas prices."
King Abdullah, visiting the newly discovered oil-rich area with President Bush and Vice President Cheney, said, "I used to think a country needed sand to have oil. Now I see it can have snow too. If America wants to join OPEC, we're open to it. But remember, we only have one vote."
The Middle East's response, including Saudi Arabia, was varied. An OPEC delegate from Saudi Arabia, speaking anonymously, said, "Allah has ensured no part of the world has more oil than Saudi Arabia. But if we see enough oil gushing in the Arctic, we might consider U.S. membership."
An Iranian representative was ambiguously assertive, saying, "If the U.S. wants to join OPEC, we could say yes or no, possibly or maybe. A positive response is more likely if the U.S. acknowledges Iran's right to develop nuclear technology for peaceful purposes."
President Bush addressed potential opposition to U.S. membership in OPEC, candidly stating, "We have a backup plan. If OPEC votes against us, we'll form a cartel with Canada, which, like Alaska, borders the Arctic Ocean. Greenland has shown interest in this group, tentatively called APEC, where the 'A' stands for Arctic. We're also considering inviting Russia to join."
Vice President Cheney, with a wry smile, added, "It's reassuring to have such massive oil reserves up north. I rather like APEC. So, for OPEC, the choice is clear?"join us or face competition."
Environmentalists were concerned. A lead researcher of the team that discovered the reserves said, "It's disheartening that finding these resources leads to extraction desires. I hoped we’d appreciate the wisdom of leaving them untouched. Extracting the oil could worsen global warming, making it easier to pump as the ice melts."
Many Eskimos welcomed the news, eager to trade their traditional attire for Arabian dress. One remarked, "Honestly, I like global warming. We've had it cold long enough."
Everyday Americans, meanwhile, were thrilled at the potential for a domestic oil boom. As one SUV driver said at a gas station, "If the U.S. joins OPEC or forms its own group, I might finally afford to keep my gas-guzzler."
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