Rumsfeld Appoints Self Retired General Rushes To Own Defense
Below is a MRR and PLR article in category Arts Entertainment -> subcategory Humor.
Rumsfeld Declares Himself Retired General, Defends His Record
Summary:
In a humorous move, Donald Rumsfeld has appointed himself a retired general amid criticism from retired military leaders. Accompanied by the head of The Joint Chiefs of Staff, Rumsfeld argued for equal status and defended his track record.Article:
Under fire from several retired generals calling for his resignation, Donald Rumsfeld took matters into his own hands by declaring himself a retired general.
Standing beside the head of The Joint Chiefs of Staff, who frequently accompanies him, Rumsfeld said, "As Secretary of Defense, I believe I should be on equal footing with a retired general, so after some thought, I've become one."
A reporter asked, "As a retired general, what's your opinion on Donald Rumsfeld?"
"I think he's doing an outstanding job," Rumsfeld replied, noting, "While no one is indispensable, there's always an exception to the rule."
When questioned about the Iraq war, Rumsfeld responded, "What war in Iraq? The conflict ended the day we toppled Saddam Hussein's statue. What's happening now is post-war recovery."
Asked whether he underestimated post-war resources, Rumsfeld quipped, "As a retired general, that's not my expertise. But as Secretary of Defense, I used all my foresight?"I just wasn't clairvoyant. I couldn't have predicted how many Sunnis would rather harm their country than live peacefully with the Shiites."
Regarding hindsight, Rumsfeld admitted he would make changes, joking, "I would've become a retired general sooner, so I could've defended myself better. During the invasion, I would've dropped leaflets encouraging peace."
"What kind of leaflets?" a reporter inquired.
"The kind we'd translate into their language with an Iraqi-English dictionary: Shiite + Sunni = Peace. Shiite - Sunni = Many Casualties."
Asked if the leaflets would have mattered, Rumsfeld affirmed, "While no leaflet is indispensable, it might've helped these groups realize they could achieve more in peace than in conflict."
In response to whether he plans to retire as Secretary of Defense, Rumsfeld concluded, "I think one retirement every decade is enough, don't you?"
You can find the original non-AI version of this article here: Rumsfeld Appoints Self Retired General Rushes To Own Defense.
You can browse and read all the articles for free. If you want to use them and get PLR and MRR rights, you need to buy the pack. Learn more about this pack of over 100 000 MRR and PLR articles.