New U. S. Military Tactic To Quell Unrest In Iraq Will Drop IQ Test On Insurgents

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AI Generated Image Title: Innovative U.S. Strategy: Dropping IQ Tests on Insurgents in Iraq

Summary:
In an effort to tackle the ongoing insurgency in Iraq, the U.S. military has humorously devised a plan to distribute IQ tests via leaflet drops. This satirical approach aims to challenge the insurgents’ logic. NewsLaugh received an advance copy and has permission to share four questions from the test.

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Article Body:

Faced with persistent unrest in Iraq, the U.S. military has proposed a novel tactic: dispersing IQ tests to insurgents by air. With usual candor, the military provided NewsLaugh with an early version of the test, along with permission to publish a selection of questions prior to distribution.

IQ Test for Insurgents

This multiple-choice exam simplifies each question to two options. Only one answer should be selected, with both correct responses being considered rather foolish.

1. How can coalition troops be encouraged to leave Iraq?
- a) Continue the insurgency
- b) Stop the insurgency

2. What is the best way to prevent the killing of Iraqi civilians?
- a) Continue acts of violence
- b) Cease all violent actions

3. How should America be accurately described?
- a) The nation that liberated Iraq from a tyrannical dictator
- b) The nation that entered Iraq, encountering an unexpected insurgency and sacrificing approximately 2,500 lives

4. What view should be held about those who support the insurgency?
- a) They are wise and commendable leaders
- b) They are misguided zealots misdirecting you

The U.S. military hopes this IQ test will enlighten insurgents about the irrationality of their violent acts, highlighting them as a profoundly misguided form of self-destruction. Only the most stubborn among them would persist in encouraging such actions.

While the outcome remains uncertain, the audacity of this approach raises its own questions.

You can find the original non-AI version of this article here: New U. S. Military Tactic To Quell Unrest In Iraq Will Drop IQ Test On Insurgents.

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