Bush Reveals New Missile Defense Guides Weapon Back To Launching Pad
Below is a MRR and PLR article in category Arts Entertainment -> subcategory Humor.
Bush Unveils Advanced Missile Defense System
Summary:
Rest easy, America. Even with North Korea's misfired attempt at launching the Taepodong 2 missile?"a name that doesn't quite evoke the allure of a new car?"there's good news.
Following North Korea's launch of seven missiles, including the Taepodong 2, President Bush shared with reporter Larry Wing that the U.S. has a groundbreaking missile defense system. "We don't just shoot down enemy missiles; we guide them back to their origin. So anyone targeting the U.S. should be ready for a quick return?"missile point first," the President stated.
Article Body:
Americans can relax, even with North Korea's recent missile mishaps, which include the lengthy-named Taepodong 2?"a title not likely to win over car enthusiasts.
In response to North Korea's launch of seven missiles, President Bush announced in an exclusive interview with Larry Wing that the U.S. has a revolutionary missile defense system: "We guide the missile back to its source. So, if you launch at America, prepare for a quick return trip," he said.
This revelation left Mr. Wing astonished. "I thought we'd only managed to dream of such defenses since Reagan's Star Wars strategy. Guiding missiles back? That's entirely new to me."
"Well, as President, I get early insights even before esteemed reporters like you," Bush replied.
"Mind if I ask how this system works?" queried Wing.
Bush admitted, "I'm not sure, but the military tells me we have the tech."
"When did this development start?" Wing pressed.
"I get all the credit," Bush joked.
Surprised, Wing asked, "Really? I didn't peg you for a missile tech enthusiast."
"Not exactly," Bush admitted. "But with the expenses in Iraq, one of our missile tech guys considered: instead of exploding a missile mid-air, what if we redirected it back? He created the joystick program in under five minutes."
"Impressive! How reliable is it?"
"Other countries are wasting their time. Their missiles are essentially targeting themselves," Bush remarked. "That's what I call a deterrent."
"How do you think North Korea and Iran will react?" Wing asked.
"They'll take notice," Bush responded. "And anything making America safer while saving costs on TNT or uranium is a win. The most economical step would be guiding the missile to an airbase for reuse. If that happens, I'll claim credit, as you’re witnessing this suggestion."
"With an innovative president like you, I sleep better at night," Wing commented.
"Thank you. I sleep during the day, mostly," Bush confided, and soon, he seemed to doze off.
Mr. Wing turned to the camera, saying, "That's all, folks. I can manage any interview, but it's tough when the guest nods off."
You can find the original non-AI version of this article here: Bush Reveals New Missile Defense Guides Weapon Back To Launching Pad.
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